I took my time with the title. I posted a while back about undergoing allergy tests, but more specifically, I am waiting until Tuesday for the food tests. I don’t know what will show up and if I’ll get any answers that are clearer to me than before. For people with rare conditions, life seems to be a complicated series of puzzle pieces. We have the edges in place. We are told to go to the doctors to get hints for the pieces that aren’t fitting. I know I am not alone in saying it is frustrating when they can’t help you figure it out. For the last 15 years, I have taken what knowledge the experts have given me and tried to apply it to my puzzle. I feel like I would like to see it completed in my lifetime. What about you? Are we scared to finally have the answer or relieved?
April is a month of mixed emotions for me. There was the birth of my first-born daughter, and that was a miracle. I was so lucky I didn’t even realize it back then. But my grandmother passed away during April from cancer and had the pieces of her puzzle been together quicker, we could have avoided that. My beloved dog also passed away. Grief is a powerful thing. There are lots of births this month to counteract the other terrible events that have happened all over the world, but even so, I feel bleah.
So I sit here writing with a high fever, and snuggly clothes on. I have the chills and I am about to read a book about werewolves…don’t ask. I’m a geek. I have pondered over all of my medical charts and drawn connections where I can, but maybe it’s time for me to let someone else finish my puzzle while I rest.
“Who in the world am I? Ah, that’s the great puzzle.” ~Lewis Carroll