Coming to the close of a year is sometimes difficult for people. Looking back over the year might bring regrets, or worry. There could be lists of things you haven’t accomplished yet, or things you really wanted to do. But the truth is, none of that matters except for the present moment. I know. It’s shocking. All that worry for nothing.
We can’t go back and change anything. Not a damn thing. All we can do is move forward.
Each year, I get a shiny new journal and I am ready to start my new goals. I never say resolutions…nope. My goals are constantly changing. My past cannot change. It really is what it is no matter what.
So how can I move forward even if I know I have made some mistakes or didn’t accomplish everything I wanted to? Here are a few pointers for you on doing just that.
Let Go of Your Past Mistakes:
- Decide to let it go at this very minute. You have to consciously MAKE this decision in the present moment. Write it down on a piece of paper, say it to yourself in the mirror, but do it.
- It’s okay to express your regret as long as you know your responsibility in the matter. Take responsibility for what you put out there.
- Don’t be the victim. Please, please, please stop placing blame. I was talking to someone earlier who might be related to me and was in the same story yet again because blame was being placed everywhere else. **Sigh** Here are 3 Tips for Turning Pity into Self-care. For later…not now.
- Learn to focus on the present through mindfulness. Mindfulness is the here and now. When we are not here, we are trapped in a story of our past or future worry. The true way to move forward is with mindfulness. It is really powerful.
How Can You Be Mindful?
- Practice Mindful Breathing by putting your hand on your belly and breathing into your hand feeling it rise and fall. In your mind just mentally repeat I am breathing in, I am breathing out. Feel the air expand and contract.
- Become aware of your body. I notice when I am not present or grounded. My husband will tell me this entire story and I will mumble along. Ha. Then he never learns to look at my eyes and see if I am “here”. I make sure if it’s important I ask him to stop and look at me. You are most powerful when you are present, but we all zone out. Learn to be powerful in your conversations by making eye contact and making sure the other person is present as well.
- Do a brief body scan and notice where you are holding tension. Mine is always my jaw. Ugh. I clench and I know it. I try to relax it throughout the day and give myself a break from working to stand up and stretch.
- Forgive yourself and stay in the present. Don’t beat yourself up if you float into the clouds or are trying to practice that breathing exercise, and start to zone out. Just bring yourself back to the present moment over and over and over. It is a work in progress that gets more powerful and easier to do the longer you stick with it.
When you learn to be more conscious, you can learn to let go. When you let go, it opens up new doors to the future you are truly ready to create. ~Aimee