Get a New Job.
There. This post is done. I am only partially kidding. Today with a few clients, I talked about what we are allowing into our lives and how that really changes our entire being. I don’t think I can stress it enough that your job and how you are dealing with it can literally make you sick depending on what you are allowing into your space.
There are silent signs that stress is making you sick…like the hives my daughter broke out in last year because she had a new boyfriend and wasn’t really wanting to spend as much time with him because she is an overachiever and was more concerned with Calculus and her 5 other AP classes (her choice by the way, she’s super smart). And me saying that she didn’t have to put so much pressure on herself. To finally realizing that something had to go (the boyfriend), and then the hives left too.
The weight that fluctuates because you either aren’t eating at all or are stress eating, right? I have been there and gained 30 pounds and I am only 5’3 (fine, I am technically 5.25, but whatever).
The headaches, the IBS, the pain, the sickness and the immune system running low all the time. Feeling like you have the flu all the time and the acne. And let’s not forget your hair is breaking off or falling out. Yup. It’s time for a change.
Can I ask you a question? What self-care have you done for yourself lately or are you still telling yourself that “you don’t have time”? Do you remember the Friends episode where Phoebe was in the hospital in her alternate world as a stock broker with a heart attack? Yup. That’s the alternate world of not taking care of yourself. I am serious because I know (which is why the tip at the end is vital).
When I was teaching, the stress of not getting things done on “time”, or turned in, and balancing a young family, a marriage, and then having time for myself was almost impossible. I told myself that for many years. Until the year I thought I was going to die. That was the year I changed.
I was a miserable shell of who I used to be. There was no more Mrs. Happy, as I had previously been called and my time was absolutely limited. This is not an over-exaggeration at all. My left hip had gone out, my right shoulder had locked up, I felt the vertebrae from the base of my neck down my spine to my tailbone. My skin was on fire daily and no one could touch me anymore…not even to hug. I hated living like that and I was actually cold daily, and could not get warm. My hands hurt and I cried each morning as I got out of bed. Then one day I just couldn’t do it any longer. I had gotten so sick that I actually couldn’t move.
Over the course of my teaching career, I had been diagnosed with Hereditary Hemochromatosis, Porphyria Cutanea Tarda, Hashimoto’s Thyroid, secondary depression, Epstein-Barr Virus in my body, then that supposedly activated Fibromyalgia which was the last straw for me. I would later find out that I also had the MTHFR gene mutation and was not able to process things at a cellular level. But my question to myself was, if these things were there, and/or were dormant, was I literally killing myself with my job? The answer was yes. I knew it deep in my soul.
I took a leave of absence for a year when I got violently ill for 3 weeks and could not stand up without throwing up. I had a case of vertigo that was brought on by autoimmune diseases and my immune system being under attack.
When I started thinking about my life, the time I had left with my kids, who were then still little, I would cry and cry and cry. When I started thinking about how much I loved my husband, so deeply in love and so pissed off at myself for feeling like a failure, a shitty wife who couldn’t even last a day without crying, I was fed up with myself.
I would have given anything in the universe to meet someone at that time who could have helped me, yet I stumbled along for another year until an inner voice said “This time is different. You were meant to go through this and the time to heal is now.” As I started using a combination of yoga, mindfulness, meditation and a therapy that I created for myself, I started to heal.
I invite you to watch this free class on some of the things I learned along the way and how I put my life back together again.
>>Watch here << and I want you to know, that it can be done. I know it’s difficult, but I outline the steps I used here to get my work-life balance back in control. It is a free workshop, so get ready with a pen and paper and learn about some of the things I did to change my life.
Again, I really want you to feel better about that work-life balance, especially if this story resonated with you and you know how awful it feels to be stressed out and sick because of your job. Please feel free to share this post with a friend who could use my free class as well.