The Balanced Empath…7 Tools You Need Today!

The Balanced Empath...7 Tools You Need Today!As I scan my feed for just a second, something comes into my line of sight that potentially has energy attached to it that could disrupt my mood.  There are posts about pain, hurting people, animal cruelty and more, but whichever post gets my attention, I know that I have the power to choose how I am going to stay balanced.  It wasn’t always this way though.

I know that I can pick up on the vibrations, moods, auras, energy or however you want to explain it of other people.  What I didn’t realize long ago was that those energies can also be projected through social media and other forms of communication.  Prior to social media being the big thing, I think people had an easier time staying balanced.  However, let’s face it, we have to learn to adjust to the changing times.

Being an empath is hard enough as it is, but becoming one that stays in balance, well, at one time that seemed like a far off dream.  I would fluctuate between happiness, sadness, anger, peace, and calm all in one hour it would seem.  Maybe it was a little bit longer than that, but I know that three years ago, moods came on me like a heavy blanket trying to smother a raging fire.  What I was doing was being swept away in the blaze, and the little bit of control I had seemed non-existent.

I was suffering from anxiety, depression, pain and illness, and 2013 was the catalyst to me letting everything get out of control.  The final straw was in November of that year and by 2014, I had vowed to change everything I was doing.  I was the only one capable of changing things.

The 7 tools I used to create balance in my life:

  1. I started with my mental body (thoughts), and learned how to recognize what was not really mine.  I did this through a variety of ways, but the first thing I tried was meditation.  I wasn’t all that great in the beginning, but I kept at it and even found a local woman who would later become one of my dearest friends who taught guided meditation in a group.  I am so thankful for her guidance during that time.
  2. I learned more about how to stay in the present moment with mindfulnessIt sounds like a buzz word.  I know.  But I started to realize how much time I was spending in moments that would never change.  Time lost to sadness over things I could never possibly go back and fix.  National tragedies, curing cancer, animal cruelty, all those things, well, I could only start with the present moment and love the ones I had now, fix the ones I can, and help those who let me.  << Who let me.  I could not stay in the moment of unbearable sadness and mourn the loss of friends or family who passed too soon.  It was robbing me of this present moment.  Hell, even looking out the window at my daughter’s playhouse was robbing me of the present moment as I was getting sad thinking of times long gone.  So I started to change the way I was thinking and thank those moments and move into the present.  The playhouse disappeared with my blessing (as well as my daughters) and is becoming a new yoga shed.
  3. The mental body was in need of repair.  The pain and suffering of my illnesses had taken a toll on my physical body.  I decided to start restorative yoga, and then gradually move to Vinyasa yoga.  I still wasn’t convinced that it was going to be my thing, but then the decision was made for me and I became a yoga teacher after 200 hours of hard-core training.  I kicked in and gave it all I had, and spent many nights soaking in a tub with new pains, of my own making this time, and the weirdest thing happened.  The pains from the past 5 years started lessening.  I then became certified in yoga for arthritis and pain…and started teaching others that there was a new way to live.
  4. I learned how to ground and stay centered…which was something no one tells you about.  I connected to the breath, the earth and my center.  Centering is literally connecting to your core.  To your essence and really getting focused on your body.  So many times I had felt “floaty” or only half here.  I started using wonderful affirmations, visualization techniques and core rooting that really helped guide me through difficult times.
  5. I learned how to let go of energy that was not mine.  This was a freaking HARD lesson and it was a huge one baby.  You know that angry driver that cuts you off, the office worker who always lies, the boss who tells you what you want to hear?  Poof.  That’s theirs.  The things in the news feed that are evil, angry, and just plain not true?  I started learning how to rise above that kind of mentality and what it meant to truly call upon my own energy and release all the other stuff.  I was in control of what I allowed in.  << Huge lesson.
  6. I gave myself plenty of time to be human…and to forgive.  I was going to occasionally drop my newly created boundaries at times, and things were going to slip.  But I knew that within was a greater power to start back up again…kind of like that tire analogy.  Do you know the one?  Where they say if you have one flat tire, you aren’t going to get angry and slash the other four, right?  Right.  You start back over fixing the one that’s flat.  So I would do energy check-ins and see what had worn me down that day…or week.  Where did I have a leak and what did I need to fix?  What was working in my life?  What wasn’t working?  Same concepts I teach in my Club.
  7. I journaled about nearly everything I could and didn’t stop.  I learned how to dig deeper than I ever thought, how to rephrase the mind, how to shield and protect my energy, and best of all, how to let go of things.  I worked on my emotional well-being with this newly created form of journal therapy.  I worked on the inside and really concentrated on understanding my gifts.  If you are in need of some journal therapy and this post resonated with you, here is something you will love >>> Journaling for Empaths <<<

Highly Sensitive people really have to make an effort every day to realign to the present moment, so I hope these tips help you.  I really expand on them in the Journal for Empaths, and I know that it will be of great benefit to you personally.  Thank you again friends.  ~Aimee

How Decluttering Your Life Helps You Move Forward

Did you know that when you are surrounded by more things than you can manage, it sends your brain a visual message that your life is out of control?  That was part of the research I did for my clients in week 3 of my 4 Weeks to Wellness program.  I asked my clients to pick 5 areas of life and work to organize it in a better and more beneficial way for them.  Clutter really and truly gets in the way of living the life you want to live.

What are some areas that you could declutter right now?

  • E-mail
  • Phone contacts
  • Texts
  • Social Media
  • Bedroom
  • Closets
  • Kids area (they need to be involved in the process)
  • Kitchen drawers
  • Garage
  • Office
  • Files

The list can and does, go on and on.  But how do we let go of these things that truly can be getting in the way?  The best way to do this is one small step at a time.  I admit I tend to be really overzealous once I start a project, but starting small is best.  For example, not the whole kitchen.  One drawer.  Then move on to the next, and the next.  One area of the garage (we do this and then it gets ridiculous again, so it’s time to do it again).  This is a life-long process of letting go.  It is also cyclical.  When someone you loves passes on, sometimes you have the monumental task of trying to get rid of things while dealing with your grief.

I want you to wait until your grief has lessened a bit as I know how hard it is.  I have held on to things for over 20 years because they were my grandparents.  I hope it doesn’t take you as long as it took me to realize that my grandparents were really and truly okay with me letting go of some things.  All they wanted for me was love and happiness.  It was a relief to not feel guilt about letting some furniture go.  You too can do this.

How to declutter your life:

  1. Determine why you still have it.  Does it have value and add to your life?  Do you still love it?  Does it even work? This is going to help you with your work.
  2. Sort it out.  Love/keep.  Donate.  Store.  <<< Don’t put everything into storage and do what my parents did.  I went out into my garage one day and found everything from my childhood in boxes.  Nice move dad.  Tinker toys from the 70’s are probably some sort of choking hazard now.
  3. Focus on ONE thing at a time.  One area.  Don’t pull a me.  I tend to need help from my kids when I start this process as I put everything back in its place and realize that THAT room, then needs to be done.  No!  One area at a time.  One.  Ohmm.  I see no other junk in my daughter’s room as I take her shoes back to her overflowing closet.  Where she hides things. and then I want to throw everything out of her closet.
  4. Take the stuff immediately to the donation center or schedule them to pick it up. <<< this is the part that makes me mad.  If I still see it, it bothers me.  Seriously, why did we go to all that trouble and I let a friend talk me into taking things to a consignment store, where I know I don’t have the energy to keep sorting these items into the best things ever to “sell” because they pick apart what I take.  Bad ju-ju for me.  Not worth it.  But if you like to sell, by all means go for it!!  Side note: the only thing I do have patience for in this area is my favorite book store where I get tons of credit to get new precious lovelies and take home and read.  I have taught my girls this process and every summer we cull the books, tons of them and get new books to read all summer.  I feel very successful when I do this.  I feel unsuccessful trying to consign because if it has one spot or dog hair on it, I get a no.  I have 3 long-haired dogs y’all.  Word.

This is a never-ending process and we must all be vigilant or it will start to creep up on us again.  I know you can go forth and sort!  And believe me, you will feel much better after reclaiming your energy from clutter.  If it doesn’t bring you immense joy, release it! 

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