Warning! Are you becoming the Hermit Empath?

“Mom.  Name the friends you hang out with.”  Sigh.  I have friends, but I am a grown woman and I like my alone time.  It is a familiar conversation in my house.  For highly sensitive people, sometimes it is very hard to be around large crowds of people, noises, and anyone who might be trying to hide things.  So that pretty much is everyone, right?

Let me explain.  We all hide things to a certain degree, of course.  However, if you are an empath, you pick up on so much more.  <<< If you aren’t sure, I liked to my first article on my experiences. Anyway, here is an example of something that might happen to me.  Someone sends me a text or a message.  It seems like an ordinary message, but behind it I feel the reason they sent it and can tell that there are ulterior motives and/or strings attached.  I decide whether or not I want to answer and how to answer as I know that there is something else coming.  Maybe this sounds a bit woo-woo to you, but it really happens.  Another example, someone says something in conversation that seems innocent to others.  I look around at a gathering and see if anyone else believes what they just said and people are buying it.  I am in disbelief because I feel the lie…and it makes me uncomfortable so I usually change the subject if it is a group of people or I just decide that it’s time to leave.

Final example on this…you go to social media and you see a series of clues that someone you know has put out there, but it’s like you have x-ray vision and no one in your circle does.  You casually mention that so and so seems to be really upset and you think maybe they need to talk about it or something along those lines, and suddenly you are starting gossip when the truth is, you were really just concerned.  This is the one that makes me upset because people are like how do you know?  What did you hear?  What do you know?  Erm.  I just felt it.  So perhaps you back away slowly from this because my, that escalated quickly.  Thus the makings for the empath hermit.

3 Social Tips for the Empath:

  1. Get centered before you go out to any event.  What does that mean anyway?  Put both feet flat on the ground (barefoot) and if you are sitting sit up straighter through the spine.  Shrug your shoulders up towards your ears, but then relax them back down as if you are shrugging, but opening up the heart area.  In my Head|Heart|Health Club, I teach these steps in a series of videos relating to yoga and connecting to the body.  So now I want you to place one hand on your stomach area above your navel.  I want you to take a deep breath in and then hold at the top and then release the breath feeling your hand rise and fall.  Do this for a round of three.  This helps get you steady, especially if you suffer from anxiety, and this breath technique is available to you at all times should you need it.  You might feel like you need to deep breathe to connect to your energy more than someone’s at a party or event as a reminder that your feelings are still there and you can then snap back into your own body.  This is very effective.
  2. Dress for the event.  Visualization and physical reminders help as well.  You might want to wear pink to remind yourself to imagine a bubble of love.  For someone not familiar with this practice, it is easy to get caught up in these bad feelings, and feel miserable for knowing things.  As we practice “bubbling up” we can visualize a bubble of pink surrounding our physical body and carrying it with us into the crowd.  As many people are quick to point out the negatives of humanity, you are going to remind yourself that there is good out there as well, and carry that feeling with you in the bubble.  Think of it as Harry Potter’s Patronus…”a projection of your most positive feelings”, and only you know that it’s there.  If you like to wear a necklace or bracelet with a word or charm on it to remind you of that, go for it.  I actually wear a bracelet with the word gratitude.
  3. Do work prior to going out and when you come home.  Here comes the part that I teach my club, talk about on my page during my live chats, and do myself daily.  I journal and I do the work.  I work through all of the feelings, and I have learned to tell immediately what is mine and what is not.  I protect myself from the negative energy of others through a combination of yoga, journaling, meditation/prayer, and more.  It has really helped me over the years take back what is my energy and sift through what might be a negative feeling that merged with mine.  For very specific instructions, videos, tutorials, breathwork, and over 30 journal prompts designed specifically for the empath, check out my guide for your soul.  <<<

The work that I have done on myself and others has helped me become more aware of how I navigate the world.  I could have saved myself loads of pain over the years if I had realized what was happening earlier in my life, but the good thing is that now that I know, I am able to get out more and make better friendships and connections than I did prior to learning how to control my highly sensitive emotions.

7 Ways to Protect Yourself From Energy Overload

You walk into the room and it is full of people.  As you start to scan the room for your friends, you see someone coming towards you who is known for negative comments.  Before they even reach you, you start to feel upset, or like a wave of bad vibes has suddenly hit you and you are about to go down.

You know that any time spent in their presence is going to feel like hours even if it just minutes.  After that, you will have no energy for anyone left in the room.  Not even your friends. 

You know that you have to see this person on a regular basis, so thankfully you have developed some tricks.

The above scenario can be played out at any place in your life.  Work.  The staff room.  Meetings.  Parties.  A friend’s dinner party.  Do you have an escape route or something that will help you?

I have worked with countless clients, yes almost all of my clients are women, but this does work for men as well who are highly sensitive people, or pick up on the vibrational frequency of others.  Is this a myth? 

Actually, it isn’t.  But it is really hard to understand and grasp so to begin with, it is important to know that everything is energy. Science, through Quantum Physics, is showing us that everything in our universe is energy.  <<< I really don’t want to break this all down like Sheldon, but here is a brief concept.

This Universal Law states that everything in the Universe moves and vibrates (everything is vibrating at one speed or another).  Everything you see around you is vibrating at one frequency or another including you.  This concept really blows people’s minds when they think about it…so just accept it for this article and we will move on.

In applying this theory though, I want you to think about the energy at work or somewhere you visit on a regular basis.  I once changed halls at work and it was the worst thing ever for my personal body.  The energy shift was palpable for me.  It was living and breathing and oozing into my body.  I was no longer happy.  The people around me were not nice and said awful things.  They literally sucked the happiness out of me.  I gradually became more sick with autoimmune until I could barely function.

Ack!!  Seriously.  It was a nightmare.  I did not know anything that would have helped me and the truth is, in this case, I had to leave the place altogether as the atmosphere was declining.  But what can you do to help yourself?

7 Ways to Protect Yourself From Energy Overload:

  1. Start to stabilize your vibration.  Give yourself an affirmation, a prayer, or repeat something like “I will not allow myself to be drained today.”  You can say a prayer or use a Bible verse to help you as you prepare to mentally stabilize yourself.
  2. Set up your boundariesVisualize the protective bubble of white light encircling you.  Again, this can be from your higher source.  So many people feel like they can’t believe in the energy and God.  I am not sure why.  It really is okay to talk to Him about this if that is your belief.  Fill the protective bubble with love from Him or your higher source.
  3. Engage with a clear head.  Once you are ready to interact with the source, remember that you control your thoughts, your emotions, your words.  <<< see this article on what you control.  Don’t let their energy control your reactions.  They do want you to listen to them endlessly so you feel sorry for them.  They do want to rope you into their story.  They do want an audience.  Their negative energy creates more drama in their lives, but they won’t change.  Start to distance yourself with a few quick comments and move away.
  4. Solutions and helpful tips can help you get away.  This part is kind of interesting because as you offer solutions and helpful tips away from the problem, you can tell if they are receptive to changing their patterns.  If they never change, if they don’t act like the idea of solutions would ever work, you know the answer.  As you focus on how stressful this situation is with them, it increases your stress.  What you focus on you attract into your bubble.  As you help them with possible solutions and helpful tips, hopefully this will tell you where they want to focus their energy.  Cool huh?
  5. Does their opinion of you matter or can you remain neutral?  So this part is hard.  Do you take the other person’s personal baggage as your own and then when they are disappointed that you are no longer willing and ready to be their emotional dumpster, does it bother you or can you safely detach? <<< read later if you need to detach.  Your sense of self-esteem and self-worth should not be attached to this person.  Cut that visually with some scissors and move on.  Value yourself enough to know you are not a pack mule destined to carry their “crap” around.
  6. Focus only on what you can change.  If you can’t change them, oh wait, you can’t.  Don’t focus on that.  Manipulators of energy, energy vampires, and narcissists stay the same.  Period.  There is no way to “fix” them unless they want to fix themselves.  It just isn’t going to happen from you.  It is time to move on and that clear up great energy for you.  That space will be filled by the right people.  Trust me.  Write out “I attract great friends who value me.”
  7. Build your vitality and energy back with self-care routines.  After my experience at work, I was really ill.  You can read my about me.  Depending on how much time you have let go, and I admit I took a few years to wake up, you might need extensive self-care steps.  I worked on my routines until I fine-tuned them to a series of steps.  If you want self-guided workbooks and baby steps to direct you, it’s called 4 Weeks to Wellness.  There are many things you can do, but I personally had to get my life back in order with fitness/movement, even small movements, nutrition, stress and balance such as giving away things I did not need to free up space for things I needed, as well as my journal therapy that I created to move forward.

My girlfriends started asking me for more help and guidance with my style of journal therapy, so I created a bonus workbook that I really love on how to move forward in 21 days!!

I have spent countless hours researching and devoting myself to being able to move forward from a place of pain and once I cleared out the negative energy around me, I truly started seeing my life change.  Good luck on your journey!

clutter

How to Protect Yourself From Negative Energy.

Protect Yourself

My last post had lots of people asking me questions on the fan page for my blog!  I know that I have personally been on a journey to gather back my energy from the places it is currently residing.  I decided to share the tips with you that I have collected so far on how I protect myself from negative energy.

How to Protect Yourself From Negative Energy:

  1. I have to say journaling is my number one protection.  I know that sounds funny, but my friends ask me for advice on what it is that I do that helps me so much, and I JUST created an e-book for you guys to use.  The above word is linked to a similar journal I use, but start writing how you feel when negative energy enters your space.  Then, imagine yourself blocking that negative energy and only allowing good vibes in.
  2. Turn on your Himalayan Salt Lamp as you meditate or journal to recharge your batteries.  It is detoxifying as well, so I also have to soak in the tub with the salt crystals so not only do I get the pure air from my lamp, but I recharge from inside as well.
  3. Distance yourself from the source as best you can.  If you have to go back into their proximity, excuse yourself to a restroom and spray this around you.  It’s not the exact one I have, but it will work to calm and center you and clear the negativity from around you.  Especially if you are getting a headache.
  4. As soon as you get home, start your aromatherapy routine.  If you don’t have one, you can try using a diffuser with oils such as this blend called “Uplift”.
  5. If someone is complaining, turn up some music!!  Seriously, be like listen, this is my jam.  And look at what I just found for your night routine!!  I actually have not used this, but am excited it came up in my search.  Seriously let me know what you think, but Chronic Fatigue CD.

If you are really out of ideas and are right there without shielding options or recharging options, use visualization.  You can center yourself by concentrating on your breath. Keep exhaling negativity, inhaling calm. This helps to ground you and purify difficult emotions that are trying to enter your space. Visualize negativity as a fog lifting from your body, and hope as warm light entering.  Always remember that the fastest way is to leave the situation if at all possible.

protect yourselfP.S. Do you need more support?  Here is the perfect place for you!  Head|Heart|Health Club now open.

Save

Save