3 Things That Kill Your Dreams (And How To Handle Them)

Dream KillersPeople always told me, “Don’t quit your day job”.  No matter how many times I said, this is not what I went to school for.  I didn’t think it was going to be like this…I am miserable and the stress makes me ill (side note, it literally did make me ill, but probably the black mold and asbestos tiles didn’t help either).  I was a classroom teacher who only ever dreamed of being a writer.

I actually loved the thought of teaching without strings attached and the children if that makes sense…I did not love lots of other things.  So I started thinking to myself, if people don’t 100% love what they are doing every single day, then why not dream bigger?

So what happened when I finally decided to leave teaching and started secretly planning my escape?

3 Dream Killers…and how to handle them:

  1. Everyone will give you constructive criticism, but it’s not really constructive.  It’s what they would do.  People talk from their place of fear.  I did not have another job lined up.  Had no idea how I was going to make it if we dropped my salary.  I did not have a large savings.  There was no safety net.  I am a kind of jump person think later…soooo.  I get told how others would have done x,y,z.  The only thing that mattered to me was am I currently happy in my job?  No.  That was all I needed to know.  So people tried to break down my dream, or give me safety net options…like just take leave for a while.  So I told people that’s what I was doing finally.  But I honestly was not coming back because I believed that strongly in my dream.
  2. Losing friends, status, or ending up an outcast.  I didn’t worry so much about this the first year, because they all thought I might be taking a year off on one of those awesome things called a “sabbatical”.  If you tell people using special jargon, they are okay with it for some reason.  Ohh, hmm.  Okay, it’s a sabbatical.  However, eventually people started saying things like “Are you ever coming back?” or “Are you really making money?”  See, I had been teaching long enough to get a pin for being there a while, and then I left.  I sacrificed the next level of pin.  I was totally okay with this.  We sacrificed a few things that were wants not needs at home.  My family was okay with this.  And if I lost friends because of this, then they really weren’t my friends to begin with and I was equally okay with this as well.  I made new friends and forged new relationships in this new world of writing.
  3. Fear of failure, being laughed at or making mistakes.  I left 3 years ago, and the first year was the most exciting; however, it was also the year I had to remember to calm down and not go overboard with trying to fit everything I wanted to accomplish in 1 year.  Overnight success might seem like a thing, but I knew it was not the case.  I had to get more established and build trust.  I wasn’t going to find the next viral blog post in a year.  Or year two either…it took year three, but I was learning and I was growing.  I was teaching myself how to think like a business woman and to stop treating my dream like a hobby.  There was no other option in my mind by this point except to succeed at what I was doing.

What helped me turn the dream into a reality?

It was not a hobby.  It was a job.  I finally learned that lesson and took back my old office instead of writing on the sofa with my laptop.  I set up appointments, collaborations, and meetings internationally on Skype.  I said yes to things that scared the hell out of me…like meeting some of my new friends face-to-face overseas by accepting the offer of speaking internationally.  I created workshops with my local friend who really treated her business like a business, and I was grateful to be able to watch her say yes only to things that would propel her in the direction she wanted to go (P.S. she made the free meditation for you guys on my newsletter).  I read books from women I admired who did scary things…like Danielle LaPorte, and I breathed in her style.

I did not create the safety net for myself because I didn’t want to fall back on it.  I wanted to keep going and try new paths should the one I was on not work out.  Some way, some how, I was going to make this new business work.  I could actually be a writer, yoga teacher, wellness advocate, entrepreneur mom and follow my heart.  Start thinking of your dream daily and journal how it would feel to make it a reality.

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3 Tips for Heart-centered Living

What does it mean to be heart-centered anyway?  Well, you have heard that your heart wants one thing, but your brain wants another before.  So let’s take a moment to examine that.  The ego, or psyche sometimes thinks first and understands later.  I know that I have been guilty of that.  However, let’s suppose for a moment that you start to really focus within and you see past the surface.  It takes a while to get used to pausing without reacting or speaking first, and learning to express from your heart, but it really can be done.

As we start to move from fear-based thinking to love-based living, the world expands.  Fear tends to shrink our environment and make us less likely to step out of that comfort zone, and love, well, love helps us do amazing things.  I am not just talking about love for others though…this part is important.  You definitely need to practice self-love and forgiveness of your own faults.  It is not selfish to put self-care into place.  So many times my clients have to step into their own beauty and realize that their oxygen mask has to be put on first.  But no one can make another person do that…it is within them to see that they need to give themselves permission to be human and practice compassion for themselves.  We don’t have to be last.  It it is crucial to realize this.  As you learn this truth, everything else falls into place.

3 tips for heart-centered living:

  1. Stop and breathe.  Are you having a heart-centered reaction or are you so busy in your head that things have quickly gone from A to Z?  Take three deep breaths, and if you are at a desk, sit up straight and tall elongating your spine and square your shoulders up and then gently bring the shoulder blades down your back.  Place the hands in your lap palms facing upwards.  Practice: Apana Vayu Mudra-The Mudra of the Heart by folding your middle and ring fingers towards the palm in such a way that they touch the tip of the thumb.  Fold the index finger inward allowing it to touch the base of the thumb.  The small finger should be stretched outward.  Keep your eyes closed and hold the mudra as long as you want to.  This mudra actually improves blood circulation to your heart.
  2. Practice compassion.  As we start to focus inwards, we realize that we have to live with compassion for ourselves and others.  We are all human going about our day in similar ways all around the world.  While we live in different places, have different lifestyles, ultimately, we want the best human experience we can have on this planet and hopefully leave it a better place.  So the struggles that involve the people we interact with on a daily basis do have some effect on us.  Practice: How are you being with people?  Look to the 4 A’s.  Attention, appreciation, admiration, and affection.  Are you open to whatever it is they have to say?  Reflect on your body language as well.  Tight jaw, tense shoulders.  Relax and open up your heart. 
  3. Live with passion.  Picture what you love doing, who you love being with, what stirs up your passion and fulfills you.  Practice: Get out your journal.  Write about what you would do if you didn’t have to worry about money?   If doubt creeps in write this instead: “I am enough, worthy, and deserving of following my passion.  I am strengthened by doing the things I love to do.  I am now living my heart-centered calling.”

Remind yourself throughout the day by touching your heart, practicing the mudra or even saying “Am I living through my heart right now or my head?”  These pauses in what we act on truly do make a difference when we don’t react right away.  Continue journaling about your passion and living through the heart.  I actually use this one every night:

Plain Blue Journal

To learn more about my new journal guide as part of my 4 Weeks to Wellness program, click here.follow heart

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The Secret to Success in Every Area of Your Life…

The Secret to Success in Life

Finding Success Took Me Years…Now You Can Benefit.

Two years ago, I was severely depressed from my illnesses.  I was in pain daily, overweight, and couldn’t find a doctor to help me…other than suggest prescriptions for life to manage my pain.  I knew that I didn’t want to do that, and February of 2014 was when I left the doctor’s office more depressed than ever as I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia…and no treatment.  None, but medicine.  Nothing to address my diet, my life, how I was going to live since I said no to this medicine that could cause more damage to my liver.

But after the sadness passed, I was determined to continue my research into helping myself, and others like me.

Today I want to share with you the one secret I discovered.

I discovered my mind played a key role in all areas of head, heart and health and I learned the secret of using my mind to become a success in every area of my life. Not just mentally, but physically and emotionally as well. It sounds so simple…but it took me almost 17 years to “wake up” and discover that the true hero of my life had to be me. The key to making this happen was getting mad, and forming a plan.

I lost over 25 pounds on my 5’2 inch frame, started moving more…and finally started feeling better. I had truly lost hope of ever feeling better before I mapped out the series of steps that was crucial in changing my life…and never would have imagined that I would make it through 200 hours of Vinyasa Yoga Teacher Training in 2015!!

Over the last year, many people in my life have seen this transformation, and have contacted my about my plan.  I do have a line of all-natural supplements that I prefer, but it was so much more than that.  With each step that I took towards wellness, each change that I made, I could feel my spirit lift.  I knew that I was on the right path.

I no longer let my thoughts of pain, depression, and hopelessness rule my life.  I took control back over my head, my heart and my health.

If you have tried everything, or at least you think you have, if you feel like you need a fresh outlook on your life, I am offering lifestyle tools for the first time online! <<< Clicking that link takes you to my new product portal. I have coached hundreds of people over the last year in my business, but decided to open it up to an online community.  Work with me to help change your life!   

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