It happened again. Someone just lied straight to your face. And you had a split second to decide what to do. So you just numbly nod your head and move on. The other choice is confrontation and how can you prove you know they lied? You can’t just say “well I felt it…” or can you? What if they think you are crazy? How do you handle this? Help!
Well, the interesting thing is this, the more tuned in you are with this person, the stronger the “knowing” is. Sometimes, you want to dismiss it because it would make your life easier. But I think it is being developed in our conscious mind for a reason. So how do we move on from here?
How to handle the “Knowing”:
- Trust your intuition. If you know in your gut you are right, you are probably on the right thought. The thought comes without reaching for it. Much like our reaction when we pull our hand away from a hot surface, shiver when we are cold, or our bellies growl when we are hungry. It is simply just there and many people don’t understand this.
- Breathe deeply. What was the first thing you thought? The first impression is often the most accurate. We then start to second guess ourselves about the thought. Breathe deeply again. Trust your gut reaction.
- Think about how you feel when you ignore it. So you know it’s there and it’s going to wake you up in the middle of the night. Can you stop your friend/co-worker from lying from you? No. You can’t do that. But what is your intention going to be if you do, in fact, tip them off you know something fishy is going on? Don’t point the finger, but instead see if there is a way for you to later re-visit this with your intention clear.
- Weight the consequences and energy output. Supposedly people are more likely to lie when they are stressed or put on the spot. So consider asking important things when someone has had time to relax or maybe isn’t in a room full of people if it’s at work. I know, to some of us who just want the truth, this seems like lots of effort, but the energy spent trying to catch the person in the lie isn’t worth it either.
- Have the conversation about what your moral code is and what you do and do not expect from a friend, co-worker, or even your boss. Of course this takes courage, but maybe they will think twice about who you really are in a world full of people wearing masks. Saying you don’t have time for that kind of life and you don’t tolerate it in your relationships can attract just the right people to your circle. Obviously, I would be careful if it’s your boss, but seriously, if a leadership figure is lying to you all the time, why work for him or her? I mean, you know, once you have your next job lined up. I am being realistic and know that honesty doesn’t pay the bills.
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